What is it to be yourself?

How are you today?

No, REALLY, how are you today?

That done with...lol back to me...

I'd love to be able to offer something inspirational and thought provoking but I really am still getting used to this whole thing.

I am proud of myself. I have reached a point where I know the health finding side of my life is integrating with the rest of what it is to be me.

The proof is that I have made a plan, daily steps to achieve what I want with my health. I am ticking those boxes off everyday. But I am not constantly thinking about it. Until recently I would feel like a failure even doing the right thing, because if I wasn't thinking about it then I wasn't dedicated enough or something, I didn't feel like I was doing enough unless I was constantly on task.

But life is. You have other things to think about all the time, thinking about losing weight all the time is not dedication, it's obsession. Now I don't mean that I am getting lazy or slipping or even considering my health as less important, thats simply not the case.

In the past 4 weigh ins I have lost 800g, then 900g, then 800g and 800g again. So I am deffinitely going in the right direction. I am proud of myself for what I am doing, what I am doing is actually more than what I had said I would do. I am now doing an hour a day of exercise, I am not only tracking points but also on cal king which gives you a break down of the nutrients in what your eating so I can make sure I'm getting enough of the right things. I have gone out for a b'day and while everyone else was drinking alcohol I stuck to water (not a terrible hardship) but I would have drunken four big jugs worth in the space of a few hours due to the amount of dancing I was doing.

I am still following the action plan, still getting all the ticks, but I don't have to dedicate all my thought to it, i can do that stuff and be thinking about other things. A more rounded thought pattern, improving myself in more than just this way. More to the point, I am okay with it. I am not feeling like a failure. I feel like I am being more successful each day.

I am not just discovering what it feels like to be healthy but I am discovering what it's like to me myself as a healthy mum, wife, and person in my own right. A person who is looking into study in mind of work down the track, a person who has just bought their own house and has things they want to do in the garden and the house.

I am learing to be me. To have a sense of whats right for me and to trust that.

Thanks for sharing this with me.
CJ